molotov or mazel tov?

Once upon a time, if you threw enough chemicals into a glass, you might wind up with a molotov cocktail.  But if you only threw in grapes and a little sugar, eventually you wound up with ‘mazel tov.’  Do I hear you saying sour grapes?  Indeed. Unlike the ‘sage’ advice just doled out by the spouse of our first in charge, I feel wo/man cannot live by one cup of H2O per day.  Yet strangely, we all lived by a bit more five or more decades ago in that golden era which bookended the Baby Boomer generation.  And part of what made us so golden were the products we lived by and loved and felt we were married to; we never foresaw the impending and one-sided divorce due to adulteration.  Funny how that word works, isn’t it?  Yet, like the current ‘wisdom’ we find our products horribly watered down but so wish it was with the pure stuff if it has to be at all. Instead we are left with something reminiscent of what we once had – just enough of the good(s) to keep us hooked to the crooks who refuse, due to huge profit margins and possible connections to Big Pharma in some conglomerate soup, to never restore us to consumer sanity.

Please, tell those companies whose products you once couldn’t live without and now can’t live with:  ‘I want my Maypo … and I want it NOW’! (provided you remember what that was).

I actually write this with one product in mind:  Coca-Cola.  Not Classic Coke.  And certainly not New Coke.  The real deal that was in thick glass bottles with metal serrated-edge caps you needed a bottle opener to pry off.  (Not the stuff on your grocery shelves today.)   Better yet, there was the ‘real thing’ that was pumped from your local soda fountain as a thick syrup, then hit with a long blast of seltzer (‘club soda’ to most) and stirred with a long (iced tea) spoon at the candy store.  Sometimes it was mixed with cherry syrup for a real cherry Coke, or a fresh slice of lemon was thrown in.  I think this even predated ice in your glass, the kind (still) often stamped with “Coke” or “Coca-Cola” on it.  Yeah, like today.  If you were not one of the lucky ones to have downed this exquisite draught, you haven’t lived.  It’s honestly been years since I’ve said ‘bottoms up!’ because that’s what is about to happen to you if you live on those chemicals in a can.

What would you oldsters give to have a real piece of chocolate again vs. something with a percentage attached?  How ’bout real unadulterated cereal?  Remember, Trix were for kids!  What about real meat, practically still mooing in the back of the butcher shop?  When was the last time you tasted chicken that truly tasted like one, that wasn’t stringy or overly plumped from hormones practically oozing beneath their skin on your plate or coated with some type of buttery-looking lard?  Even soap:   Did you ever smell a bar of real Dial, pale green football-shaped Palmolive or Camay, long before the time they made you cringe and sneeze?   Does anyone remember Drakes cakes:  Ring Dings with that thick shiny chocolate icing, Devil Dogs of rich cocoa, and Crumb Cakes topped with a thick layer of struesel crumbs vs. mainly powdered sugar?  And then there’s the fast food joints.  But I’ll end with one that I still frequent infrequently, Dunkin’ Donuts.  Anyone remember their namesake item?  The staff behind the counter sure doesn’t no matter what their ages, and it’s been what …. not even two full decades since that plain fried donut with a handle disappeared from their shelves jammed with almost everything but what made them famous.

Boycotting puts companies out of business.  I’m not asking for that.  I’d much rather see each and every one of you who reads this blog to write their manufacturers, companies and restaurants, reminding them of what’s important to you – what put them on the map.  If we keep getting what they’re dishing out, none of us will remain long enough to complain.


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September 23, 2013 · 6:51 am

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